March 19, 2019

I have been fortunate enough to do a bit of traveling lately; much more than ever before. Being in a committed relationship with my partner Frank, who is not only a frequent but very efficient traveler, I have found myself the proud owner of a brand-spankin’ new passport for overseas travel and an official “KTN” (Known Traveler Number) so I can bypass the “long” line and more importantly, I don’t have to take off my (fabulous!) shoes or pull my computer out of my carry on when going through airport security. It feels so fancy!

Regardless of this new found privilege of speeding through the fast lane, I admit that I still MIGHT make traveling a tiny bit difficult. Last year I made the decision not to travel without my essential oils. I assembled a “mini” essential oil kits to include over 100 oils to easily fit in my carry-on. (And, just for the record, I’ve never regretted it or NOT used them) With this aromatic little package tucked into the top of my backpack, the conveyor belt slowly carries it into the x-ray scanner, and eight out of ten times it emerges out a secret side chute, accompanied by a uniformed escort and a golden opportunity for a quick little tet a tet (aka: bag search) with the TSA bag security people. The conversation goes something like; (Me) “Those are just my essential oils...would you like to sample one? You look stressed...Are you stressed? This is a stressful job. How are you sleeping? Do you need a pick-me-up? I have just the oil for you, would you care to sample it? I can roll a little on your wrist, you’ll love it.” Alas, a connection is made.

Seriously. These oils have been the kickstarter for many a conversation. I’ve heard anything from, “I love the smell of lavender” to “This bag smells awesome...and that’s high praise coming from a guy who opens a LOT of bags”. These TSA men and women deal with people who are stressed, rushed, and being corralled through the pre-flight cattle herd as they make their way to their gates.  Why not splash a little sunshine on their plate? Dare I say, essential oils have brought the “bag search” experience to a whole new level of fun! The bag search has happened enough times that as a result, Frank adds on an extra 10-ish minutes for check in so that I will have enough time to actively participate in impromptu essential oil sampling’s. Adding these “extra” ten minutes allows us to slow down a little. I suppose there is always an exception to the rule, but for the most part, meaningful connections don’t happen when you are moving at warp speed. Rushing doesn’t allow us to be in the moment. There’s no time to genuinely listen, to see all of the gifts around us, or to appreciate that we have a part in something bigger than ourselves. Slowing things down a bit, allows us to travel with gratitude and positive intentions. Slowing down is what we need, whether we know it or not. It’s where the connections happen.

Have you ever scanned an airport and really looked at the people around you? What is their energy like? What does their body language say? Who’s day could be brightened? Although the jury is out as to whether I fall into the category of “crazy nut job who walks up and engages people in random weird conversation”, I do love to pay it forward with a smile, a compliment or a passing positive comment. In any given day, there are so many opportunities to connect; complimenting someone who is standing in line waiting to purchase an overpriced bottle of water, lending a helping hand to parents who don’t have enough hands to manage the number of energetic/tired/independent children they have with them, or engaging with the person lucky enough to sit next to me on the plane. (**Insert the visual of wringing of hands and boisterous evil laugh: Bwahahaha!!**)

Everyone has a story. Some are comfortable sharing and others aren’t. I personally believe that people want to be heard, understood, and desire connection. When they are open to it and a connection is made, people feel less lonely, even if only for that moment. What is the worst that could happen if you tried to initiate a conversation, ask a few follow up questions, then sit back and really listen? Not solve their problem or offer unsolicited advice, just listen with the intent of understanding and learning. What people share can be downright fascinating (or can leave you thinking “wow!”) Either way, it is a gift. It is such a privilege to be trusted enough to have someone open up and share their heart. The interaction doesn’t have to take a lot of time, just as long as it is genuine. When it is, it’s a beautiful thing.

I bring up airports because personally, I look at them as the place that houses all of the friends I just haven’t met yet. Being in one reminds me of how MANY people with whom we share our planet. It doesn’t really take much out of us to take a breath and make a connection with; your drive up bank teller, with a comment about how much your dog wishes he was there with you to get the drive-thru dog bone, or the check out guy in Target to say he should check out the selection of flip flops in the shoe section on his break or that lady that you smile at in the grocery store then realize you are both going in opposite directions and you keep meeting up in every aisle and it gets weird… instead of averting your eyes and pretending to read the supplemental nutrition facts on the can of garbanzo beans you don’t intend to buy, take the weirdness out of it and give them a fist pound or high five and throw in a “we’re totally nailing aisle 4” (OK, admittedly, there is no judgement from me if you feel the overwhelming urge to jump over to the the bread aisle after 4 or 5 encounters, the connection was made… let’s not ruin a good thing!)

Since my kids have all left the nest and my time is not shared with as many people over the last two years, I have spent many many hours soul searching; what brings me joy? What do I look forward to when I get up every morning? For what exactly am I striving? Although I’ve lived it, I have only recently been able to articulate that it is the act of establishing genuine connections that matters the most to me. In every capacity, they are infinitely valuable.  Whether that is with a smile, a non-judgemental, active listening ear, or holding the desire to truly understand/empathize and meet someone where they are, people open up. As a shaman, energy healer, hospice nurse, partner, mother, sister, daughter, friend, frequent traveler, and aisle 4 grocery store fist bumper, I believe that the connections I make and maintain are the gifts that have allowed me to grow (and continue to grow) exponentially. If my personal connections can raise the vibration of the world (and I know they do!), imagine what our collective vibrations could do.

With love and gratitude~